Jeans, Whoomp!

Conquering jeans has been a dream of mine for quite some time. Something I kept on the back burner on a low-heat setting, mind you, but still a dream.

But then I gained some weight over the past year. About fifteen pounds. Not a jaw-dropping amount, but enough to make my wardrobe grunt, strain and (occasionally) keel over. Whatever. In my life, weight loss has usually been associated with loneliness and unhappiness, so I assume that I gained weight because I’m in a happy place, and because I’ve gotten really good at cooking.


But that extra fifteen pounds has made attractive mall jeans somewhat elusive. Suddenly I’ve entered a world of cavernous crotch depth, mile long legs, and thighs that could fit around redwood trunks. I don’t understand why retail clothing designers, who work in a world of ever-changing trends, still haven’t clued in to the fact that consumers have been getting fatter for years. I mean seriously, if y’all want to take money out of my pudgy little fist, you’re gonna have to start drafting up some decent-looking size twelves.

Which I can now do myself, so fuck you:


This is my first pattern that I drafted using the advice of my favourite pattern drafting book ever. I altered my basic trouser block into a slim fit slacks pattern. But with denim. And a sailor pant closure (which I’m now officially tired of, so I shall henceforth be focussing my pant studies on the fly closure).

Let’s take a lookypoo:


This was also my first time using topstitching thread. Might’ve been my last time using topstitching thread, as well. My machine (Singer Heavy Duty 4411) wasn’t really into it, and the thread kept skipping whenever I’d hit multiple layers.


However, the regular Gutermann thread seemed to work fine (I love the single line of stitching on the back pockets, btw):


And although this pic was taken with the intention of showcasing more topstitching follies, I kind of fell into a swoon gazing at my belt loop:

That is a sexy belt loop.

That is a sexy belt loop.

I used tutorials from Craftsy and Coletterie for my belt loops, and they turned out great.

So yeah, I’m making my own pants, better than the mall shit, and bragging about it on Twitter. How do you like my fat ass now, H&M?


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